What a relief! Just for the moment...

Oh, gee! Here I go again, trying to make my day a little more livelier. Anyway, enough of my stupidity. I'm having a confusion here on what blog account should I update first. Well, I can say that I'm not into a good mood or rather sad feeling today. I'm just fine and happy about everything that happen yesterday. Want to know more?

I've just gone through the hospital and the doc has already taken off the casts in my both knees that is in me for almost 3 months now. I do hope everything turns out just fine. At first, I felt the nerves pumping out of my system and it makes me want to walk away. But that is impossible. I was already there and I know that there is no turning back. The moment that the doc ripped off the casts I felt a bit of uneasiness because there's something I felt that is kind of achy. I think that is because there are some wound that is still fresh and there is an iron implants at the side part of my knee. But the good news is that, the doc taken it off from my knees with no surgery or anesthesia. What a relief! Whew! #o But again the thing is that the iron implants that is still in the inside part is still there so I'm still going to undergo another surgery just to let it all out. Maybe August or September will be my next schedule... I'll keep you posted!

Already Halfway to end 2006!

It's funny though how time flies so fastly! Its nice knowing that we are already in the halfway to end the year 2006. And it just can't stop myself from questioning "how's my life"? "where do I go from here"? "what happen's next"? so on and so forth. Do you think now is the best time to be sad and to regret all the things that come undone? I don't think so. Every now and then, it's nice to reflect and meditate for once in a while like a sort of reality-check of what's going on in our lives.
But, sometimes changes brought by some of the other circumstances in life makes me terrified a lot of a times. It seems that the kid in me wants to hide somewhere in a middle of a nowhere. A feeling of a distinct innocence that will always be within me wherever I go. I guess, that is life some kind of a mystery waiting to unfold any time from now. Do you agree with that?
This is sucks! I'm still here sitting, waiting and wishing for something I couldn't have. I realize that there are certain things in life that you needed that you couldn't have until it's not yet the proper time at the same time a lot of perseverance and hardwork is needed to accomplish what you really want. I'm not yawning, okay. Take note that there is a big difference between having the things you like and having the things that you needed. Do I sound complaining? No, I don't. Whoever says that I do, you're all wrong! (^_^) (D)Ohhh! where's the good times?! (^_^)

New Hair Cut! *yikes*

Anyways, I decided to have my hair cut short done by sister Neriza. I don't know why interests me so much yesterday. Maybe be'coz I'm tired fixing my hair and since I will not be away from home so I think I can bear with it. I really don't like my hair cutted short be'coz you see it's so curly and wavy so I guess you have an idea what I looked like these days. yeah, I know, my hair looked like a poodle when it was not brushed.

Well, never mind, this whole hair cut thing is no sense to say. It's not really a problem I can make it through. I'll be back!! (^_^)

The feeling I felt yesterday!

Yesterday, I was struggling with my emotions of deep anger about my father. How can he be so damn insensitive about what his family truly felt regarding his betrayal to us. I really don't know what we're gonna do about it. It's really hard to have that courage to stand still especially there is this person who is so close to you drifted you in a way that you never thought. I hate to make judgment about him but that is the truth. I don't want to put all the blame on him about what's happening but he allowed it. As a family, a kid, we never ask so much to him that he can never give and this is what he did to us.

I don't know what will gonna happens next in this coming months. But to tell you the truth, it feels like I have thorns at my chest be'coz of this things happening to us. It envy me especially whenever I see a family who is close and open to each other and seeing a father who is so supportive to his wife and kids. I don't want us to compare to other families but I can't help it. There is this gap between all of us to him that whenever he's here there's a doubt to what his saying and the way he treated us. I'm just hoping that our good Lord helped him to open up his eyes and his heart to live his life according to God's standard.

Anyways, I'm planning to enroll in a distance learning study somehow to get a short term degree in creative writing or anything that suits me. I guess, that is a good idea since my whole time was spend here at home and things would be more convenient for me while my medication is still going on. These days seems that I really can't smile or have a rest for awhile be'coz you see in a minute or two problems are always get me pissed off.

Uhhhmm, when will that be? I mean the day when all this troubles be so far away... sound like a song?! (^_^) :D I hope my next log on here, I would share some good news so that it would not ruined your day. If there's a good thing to share, why not! :) :D (^_^)

Well, my life has always been the same pathetic as I am... Do you agree? :) (^_^) tsk, tsk, tsk...

I'll come back soooooon!!! (^_^) Paalam!